What happens when your actions end up ruining someone else’s life? How do you make up for that?

Finals week is over finally and I can relax.

I recently spoke with a female friend of mine, she was feeling down, sick, and she told me it was hard to breathe nowadays. I didn’t think much of it, besides the normal comforting words from a friend, though thinking back, I probably should have done more. This friend of mine was known (as I found out later) as a person who probably slept around and was considered “easy”. The truth was, she had been dating this no-good guy and he had gotten her pregnant and then dumped her. She was “abandoned” by her parents because of the pregnancy and was feeling lost because of it all, I found out that she ended up aborting the baby.

I found out later that when I spoke to her, she was deciding whether to keep it or abandon it. I feel that it was unlikely my opinion on the matter (if I had known the truth) would have mattered, but it’s a disgusting feeling when I think that my inability to do what I should have done caused someone’s death.

Now just so we’re clear, I’m against abortion, I detest it, I detest people that do it, and I detest the people involved with it. OR at least I thought that was opinion. Now that I’m involved, do I hate myself? Even if I didn’t know. Do I hate my friend? she had no means to take care of it. Do I hate that bastard because he was a coward? I’m a coward too.. Do I hate those at the clinic? they are doing what they must to make a living out in this harsh world.

A thought that often crosses my mind is, what if I had the power to change things? Well I think that humans can do anything they put their mind to and I’m sure I do have the power, but I don’t see it, I guess I need direction.

I often see and hear about young women aborting their children, it’s a disgusting thought that so many men are cowards and so many women give their first sexual experience to their boyfriends, instead of their husbands. Maybe it’s because of my disconnection to today’s society, but why can’t we move a bit to the more moral days. I’m not the most moral person myself, but at least I value life and know that my actions have consequences on others.

For all of you thinking of getting an abortion out there because you are scared and no one will be your support you, know that Ash supports you!  Keep your child and I pray that you’ll be blessed for doing so.

Utada Hikaru – Simple and Clean (English)


I’ve Sound, Whatever lies beyond this morning, the future doesn’t scare me at all.